Always Play Safe!

When it comes to being online, or in person, it’s always important to be safe and take precautions.  What you are up to and what you are doing are going to determine what you  need to do but there are a few things that you should always consider.

Henry Kirke Brown George Washington statue,Union Square in New York. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Meet Somewhere Public

A coffee shop, a restaurant, a park, whatever works.  You should always meet somewhere that is public which will prevent the other person from doing something crazy (if things go that way).

Take Your Own Transportation

Never let the other person pick you up or drive you around.   If you are driving home after and you feel like you are being followed, do not go home, go somewhere public or a police station if you are scared.

Listen to Your Gut

If you  meet someone, or they suggest something that you are not comfortable with them, do not be afraid to say no.  Worst comes to worse, they decide that they do not want anything to do with you, and really, do you want to be with someone like that?

Do’s and Don’ts

Are there certain things that you refuse to do or that you love to do?  Let your partner know.  It’s always best to tell them before you hook up so that you can avoid any discomfort and allow you to see if the two of you are compatible.

Protection

If this is someone that you are potentially going to be getting intimate with, discuss birth control.  Many men do not like condoms but they are willing to use them if it is the difference between sex or not.  Do not let a partner guilt you into not using them as they enjoy the sensations without or they perform better without.  If things go well, there is lots of time for that down the road.

No matter, is a good idea to let someone know where you are going to be and when you expect to be home.  They don’t need 100% specifics but the more they know, the better, just in case.  There has been a time or two that I have sent a friend the information about where I am going, who I am meeting, and their contact information.  You just never know (but hope you never need to use the information provided!)

 

3 Things to Discuss Before Getting Naked

Whether you are looking to date someone or just have a play partner, there are some things that you really should discuss before you start ripping clothing off.  They  may be awkward to discuss but it important to get them out there.  If you do not like their answer, or it doesn’t jive with you, you may want to reconsider if they are the right person to get down and dirty with.

morning .05 (Photo credit: pipe.martínez)

Tested

When were they last tested for STDS?  Have they had partners since then?  Personally, I’ve never asked for proof of this from the doctor but I am sure some people have.  Even if you are using condoms, if you are engaging in any type of oral sex, this is relevant.  Unless you plan to use dental dams and other equipment to avoid direct contact.

Birth Control

Another important discussion.  If neither of you has any plans to have children with each other, or at this time, birth control is a must.  Never believe a guy who says he cannot have children (I know a lady whose guy told her this, guess what?  she got pregnant).  If he says he has a vasectomy, you may want to have a dr’s note before you agree to no condoms.  Regardless, you should use them for the first while due to disease. I am a firm advocate of the woman being on some form of birth control as well.  The form may be discussed as not all methods are as fool proof as others.

Pregnancy

What will happen if the female gets pregnant?  This may not be a first night discussion but if you are going to remove a type of birth control (ie condoms) and only rely on one or none, it is likely a good discussion to have.   Even if neither of you are looking to have children, accidents can happen and it doesn’t hurt to know the other person’s opinions before it happens.