This is the final installment of a series of posts on BDSM. The first post can be found here.
This week is about sadomasochism, often abbreviated as S&M, SM, or S/M. Sadomasochism is sexual pleasure gained by inflicting pain, suffering, and/or humiliation (sadism) or derived from suffering, humiliation, and/or feeling pain (masochism).
As with other types of BDSM, practitioners of S&M are not all the same. Unlike what you may have seen in movies or read in books, many do not don identity concealing masks and carry or wear chains. Just as the actions that are enjoyable to those engaged in S&M activities may vary from spanking to playing with hot wax or knives.

As you may have noticed in previous posts, the various aspects of BDSM are often interconnected. This is true with S&M. For instance, spanking as a form of discipline, done by a Dom to a sub, may be considered S&M play as well. In many regards, S&M is more of a mental type of play than any other aspect of BDSM. Sadists derive pleasure from the action – or even just the thoughts – of inflicting pain upon another just as masochists derive pleasure from fantasizing or having pain exacted upon them.
Please note that S&M is not the same as sexual violence. Practitioners of S&M are consensual adults; however, if serious injuries are caused by S&M play, those inflicting the injury may be punishable by law.
Looking for credible sources for additional information?
- Whip Me, Beat Me, Make Me Write Hot Sex by Tymber Dalton (see my review here)
- A Submissive’s Initiative – an educational BDSM community
- The Loving Dom – The Repository – The back catalogue of educational notes relating to alternative relationships + interesting threads from The Loving Dom – The Help Page.
As always, remember: Safe Play is Great Play!