The Basics of BDSM

This is the first in a series of posts.

For some, these four letters immediately makes them squirm in discomfort, yet many of these people may already incorporate BDSM  types of activities and not realize it. How can this be? Simply put, kink comes in all sorts of varieties, making it as varied as the people involved.

What is BDSM ? To answer this we need to examine what each letter stands for.

English: A man handcuffed to a bed and blindfolded
A man handcuffed to a bed and blindfolded (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Bondage and discipline play (B & D or B/D)

Bondage – A physical restraining, it can mean total bondage or just a part of one’s body, such as breasts or balls. The materials and degrees of severity are varied. It is important to understand the possible risks of various bondage practices.

Discipline – A psychological restraining, often by the use of punishments or rules. Spanking and humiliation are examples.

Dominance and submission (D & S or D/s)

Dominance – Most often this practice is considered a set of behaviors, or even rituals, involving the acceptance of control over another. The Dominant (Dom or Domme) controls the submissive in a variety of ways that may or may not be sexual in nature.

submission – The opposite of a Dominant, the submissive gives control to another.

As a side note, there are some, called a switch, who are comfortable in both Dom and sub roles.

Sadism and masochism/ sadomasochism (S&M or S/M)

Sadism – Simply put, this is sexual pleasure gained by inflicting pain, suffering, and/or humiliation. The term comes from Marquis de Sade, an 18th-century French writer.

Masochism – The counterpart to sadism, this is sexual pleasure derived from suffering, humiliation, and/or feeling pain.

Next week I will continue to delve into the various aspects of BDSM .  As always, remember: Safe Play is Great Play!

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