Reigniting the Spark

From time to time, those in a long-term relationship may fondly remember the near-overwhelming excitement of those first few intimate encounters.  The first time you and your partner kissed, the first time you saw one another undressed, and the first time you had sex, each event is often blanketed in the glow of new love.   As time goes by, and you become more comfortable with one another, the sparks lessen; however, there is something wonderful about the familiarity that comes with long relationships.  The exhilaration from burgeoning love can still pop up after many years together, though you may have to work at bringing the magic to the forefront.

  • The more popular technology becomes, the less we are speaking in person to one another.  Take the time to talk face to face – even if only for a few minutes.  Keep the conversation focused on each other, rather than on work or family.  And don’t forget to make eye contact.
  • Touch one another.  Hold hands while walking.  Rub your partner’s neck while he is driving.  Make skin contact beyond the sexual.
  • As our lives become busier, it is important to make time to spend with your partner with just the two of you.  Go on dates.  If you can’t have one every week, ensure you have one once a month.
  • Kiss.  While sweet, quick pecks are lovely, deeper kisses can lead to a deeper connection.  Sit on the couch and make out like a couple of teenagers.  If it leads to sex, that’s just an added bonus.
  • Do things together.   Have to hand wash some dishes?  One can wash while the other dries.  Need to walk the dog?  Go together, hand in hand.
  • Remember flirting?  Start doing it again!  Flirt with your partner.  Compliment her hair.  Tell him he looks sexy in those jeans (and give him a pinch or pat when you do).  Make sexual innuendos.

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